The Election, As Told By Status Updates

I suppose we've stepped up a notch in instant gratification by sharing our thoughts with the world through Twitter and the Status Update features on social network pages.

My remarking on that is, well, unremarkable. But, when I spent as much time on November 4th reading friends' up-to-the-minute Facebook updates as I watched CNN for election updates, I realized we had hit another plateau.

I was moved.

You can pretty much follow the sequence of events, just by the nature and tone of the updates. While I kept the posts in their natural chronology, for brevity's sake, I did omit a few that seemed repetitious.

Here is a Twitter-ish narrative of one of the most important days of our generation spanning from the afternoon of November 4 to the afternoon of November 5:

(names withheld)

- is voting
- is going rogue
- is wondering who got their free starbucks and Krispy Kreme?
- is happy she voted today!
- is solid. Solid as Barack!!!
- thinks it's funny that someone was actually stealing my campaign signs from my friends' yards
- is awaiting the results of change
- is watching CNN and HAPPY
- is going to be watching election results while he bowls
- is hopeful about tonight's results
- voted for Snoopy
- says way to go OHIO!
- is thinking she needs to go to bed
- is keeping in mind that when life gives you lemons, make lemonade.
Then find someone who's life gave them vodka and make a party!
- ...exhale
- is so relieved
- is so pumped- what a great day!
- remembers his kindergarten teacher telling him he could grow up to be president.
For the first time in many lifetimes, all children can believe their teachers.
- 's heart is THUMPING right now! I am proud to be an American! We made it Dad!
We made it!....speechless!
- is throwing a party to welcome back his faith in America.
- is not quite ready for three months of racial talk form the talking heads...
his race is Human, people.
- yes. we. did.
- WOOOOOOO - FRIGGIN' - HOOOOO!!!!!!
- is ready to fight and work for a new era of hope and possibilities.
- can't wait to hear the speech that will inspire and change the way the world looks
at the US from here on out.
- had to take a Xanax!
- realizes the phrase "Scranton in the house" is now not just stupid,
but for the next few days, a pun as well.
- says YES WE CAN!
- wow, that was a long 11 month journey. I'm so excited about the outcome,
but after seeing the speech, I'm excited about the future.
- is saying "Oh hot dam" and throwing his hands up in the ayer ay ayer
- is taking a breath and an Aleve
- now projects that in the United States of America there will be hangovers in the morning...
- is inspired!!! Thank you President Obama...I love the sound of that!!
- thinks Fox News isn't news at all; rather, it is the 700 Club and Comedy Central
mixed together. Viewers, please turn the channel and form your own opinions.
- is so happy to have stayed awake to watch history happen! What an awesome sight it was!
- is looking forward to discussions about ANYTHING other than politics
- assures you all, what you winessed last night is real.
- apparently rocked the vote a little too hard and f'd up my knee somehow.
- can't wait to see Dubya's face at the swearing in. It will be priceless.
- America, you may have have elected a black President, but 45 states have bans on gay
marriage. The Civil Rights fight is far from over!
- thinks there is a direct correlation between Obama's victory and the fact that I haven't
had a cigarette in over 5 weeks! Yes I can!
- thinks that hating Obama isn't going to fix anything. Let's give him a chance.
He is our president.
- is happy to be living in ObamaCa :)